The first audition is always the worst

      Oh please, let it be so.


I wonder if Elton John remembers his first audition. I wonder if it was messy, awkward and embarrassing, or if it sparkled with the confidence and self-assurance that it takes to wear whole outfits just as sparkly.

I had my first audition this week, and while it was an experience I'd sooner forget, I'm sure I'll remember it for a long time to come.

To cut a long story short, I was made to do an impromptu 'audition' to get into a Ensemble class for the semester (a class made up of small groups in different musical formats). Despite the fact that I'm a Composition major, and was hoping for the vocal ensemble (where I could comfortably blend in with some other baritones and sway in all the right places), they wanted to put me into a group with Contemporary Performance majors. But they had to check I was up to scratch.

Thus ensued my unprepared, unrehearsed, nerve-wracked piano and singing audition, and, after bumbling through a rather awkward recital of 'Georgia on my mind' on the keys, I was asked to sing something.

I. Had. Nothing.

Nothing.

Drawing blanks.

Good grief, this is so embarrassing! He must think I'm such a twerp.

"Um, what would you like me to sing?" I asked, stalling for time.

"Anything you want," said he.

Thanks for your help. 

"Like what?" I persisted, silently pleading with God for either divine inspiration or a fatal aneurysm.

"Well, what you normally sing. What do you sing when you have a gig on a Friday night?"

Are you serious? I've never had a gig in my life! At least none that somebody's enjoyed so much they felt they needed to pay me for it! "Oh. Ok. Um..."

Nothing.

In hindsight, I could have sung a Disney song. I've done a couple of those at weddings. Or a Casting Crowns song - I had some good feedback on those when I'd performed at special church services.

Nothing. Nada. My head was as blank as the expression on my face.

And so, grasping at the first and only thing I could think of, that's how I came to sing 'Advance Australia Fair' for my audition into a Contemporary Performance class.

What. A dork.

If the bloke assessing me was laughing on the inside he deserves a damn medal for keeping himself composed. I don't know what he would have found funnier: my unrehearsed, off-pitch singing or the fact that the nervous fiddling with my necklace as I sang probably looked remarkably like holding my hand to my chest in a dedicated show of patriotism.

Please, just let the ground open up and swallow me whole...

Strangely enough, instead of my enrolment being cancelled on the spot, I was accepted into the class.

(As a pianist, fortunately...)

So now, whenever I hear our beloved National Anthem, I know I'm going to remember my first ever audition in the big, bad music world. And cringe.

Oh hell. The Olympics are on this year.

I'd better steer clear of the swimming.

Pachelbel Rant

A friend of mine shared this on Facebook the other day.

While I may be a little late to the party on this one, as a cellist' I found it resonated with a certain tone of Truth.

To infinity and beyond

What an optimistic title to this blog.

That's so unlike me...

Still, it captures pretty well what this post is about.

If I had wings like this, perhaps I'd've done this sooner.

January 2012 marks the start of something new for me. I have pulled up my roots in Townsville, and am currently on my way south, as I relocate to Sydney.

I've had the pleasure of spending the last nine years in Townsville, having moved there straight after finishing high school to study and then work as a pharmacist. I will always look back on these years as a huge blessing - the beginnings of independence and getting to know myself as a person, and really coming to terms with the meaning and implications of my faith.

I'll always look back on these years with joy and thankfulness, not least of all because of the people who made it happen. I left a lot of friends behind, but took with me treasured memories. And I take comfort from the fact that, for those of us who are united together in Christ, there are no Goodbyes.

So so long, Townsville, and thanks for all the fish. You were great, but it is time for a sea-change. One can only stand their soul being ground away in the public service for so long before something snaps. And my something did snap. So it must be time to try pursue something I actually enjoy!

And so to Sydney it is, where I'm aiming to work part-time as a pharmacist while I go back to uni and study music (composition and music production, to be precise). Yes, I'm petrified, and yes; it's a far-fetched goal, possibly chasing after an even-further-fetched dream, and no; I have no idea what I'll possibly do with it at the end, but...

Well, actually, that's it. That's the truth of the matter. Still, it's worth a shot.

While studying, I'll have the pleasure of living at Moore Theological College, in the single men's residence. This, I must say, I am really looking forward to: Halls of Residence are petri dishes well suited for breeding (among other things) great friendships.

And since I'm taking my coffee machine, I'm hoping it'll give me a head start.

My New-Year Resolutions

So Happy New Year, and all that.

The start of 2012 means a lot of different things to different people. For me, the year ticking over means it's probably time for another blog post.

Don't get confused. This post shouldn't be misinterpreted as some kind of New Year's Resolution to start blogging more regularly. It's not. Though any rational individual might take comfort from this fact, as it means it's more likely to survive past the first twenty minutes of January.

I have made a few resolutions this year. When I started writing this blog post I had two. Now I have three. And no; 'blogging more regularly' didn't just sneak in there. Incidentally, I was also going to include 'Be Optimistic' on my list, but excluded it after I decided that was probably too optimistic.

My first resolution... Hang on I forgot. No, that's right. My first resolution is to

Read my Bible every day.


Even if it's just a chapter. Or a bit of a chapter. Or a portion of a bit of a chapter. The point is, I need to make more of an effort. Even if the resolution fails to reach optimum potency and I manage once a week, that'll still be an improvement on this past year, and I'm glad to report that at Luke Chapter 5, so far so good. I decided to start with Luke's Gospel as a refresher course on the God-man Jesus - His life, His teaching and the amazing thing He did for us on the cross at Calvary. The centre of the Christian faith (and my relationship with God) begins with Jesus, so my resolution probably should, too.

Resolution number two is to

Stop being so self-deprecating


I've always been my harshest critic, but rather than leading to self-improvement, it drives me to despair. Rather than being inspired by people who are better than me, my gut reaction is one of 'What's the point? Leave it to them.' And I give up. Not quite the ANZAC Spirit famed in Australian History. So I hope to change this, and let inspiration fuel me rather than cut me down. The truth is, there will always be people around you who are stronger, faster, smarter, more-talented, funnier, Godlier, charismatic and better-looking than you are (I'm stopping this endless list here as it's starting to get depressing), so if that gets you down, you're going to be disappointed for the long haul.

Finally, resolution number three is to

Get healthy healthier

Yes, I know this is frightfully generic and cliche, but I'm a pretty generic kind of guy. I managed to start some gym action late last year, which in turn made me feel guilty about what I was eating (let's face it: guilt is one HELL of a motivator). Continuing gym on my new budget may be a little tricky, so I'm going to adjust my plans a little. Food-wise, the goal is portion control, and since I'll be living in the Halls of Residence at Moore College this year, I'm expecting the incentive to be baked into the food. Exercise-wise, 30 minutes a day of SOMEthing that's not sitting around on my butt, grazing. (I may come from cattle-country, but the similarities have to stop somewhere.) If there are any other Moore students who might happen to be reading this, looking for an exercise-buddy, I'll motiviate you if you help motivate me (use of cattle-prods permissible only in extreme circumstances).

So that's the plan. 2012 is the start of a whole new life for me, so hopefully some (long-overdue) positive changes in areas of health, self-perception and God-life will be well-received, and make it through to 2013.

Or at least into February.

Tautologies are great, or they're not.

I discovered something the other day - I love tautologies.


You might never have heard of a tautology, but you probably hear the sneaky little suckers on a daily basis.


For example:

I'll see you when I see you.

That's a tautology, or as Google's Dictionary puts it, 

A statement that is true by necessity, or by virtue of its logical form.

Why do I like tautologies? Probably because they're little packets of truth, impervious to any attempt to disprove them.

What are some of your favourite tautologies? Share them in the Comments section. I might publish the best in my next post.

But don't hold your breath.

It'll happen when it happens.